Am I weird?

by Alex
(New Zealand)

Hi there,

I am a teenage guy and 15 years old. I live in a small country called New Zealand. Anyway I like to think of myself as having a different viewpoint on relationships and sexuality to most guys my age.

When I see and meet a girl I don't immediately think "Man she's hot." or "Man she's ugly". I don't make an immediate judgement but I need to know the girl to know whether I like her or not.

Obviously some girls are better looking than others but I wouldn't treat them any differently. The thing I think is weird is there are pretty girls who most other guys call "Hot" but I think they're are really pretty and are just beautiful and my way of saying I like them is like I want to hug them and never let go.

Most guys call me gay because I don't want to have sex with them but I fail to see how hugging someone who I like and snuggling up with them is "gay". I've also been told by my close friends who are mostly guys since I'm quite shy around girls, that I'm really nice.

I really wish girls could see that I'm a really nice guy who doesn't pressure them into sex and loves them for who they really are. But don't get me wrong, I'm not against sex; I just believe that it's OK when she is ready to have sex rather than a jerk that just wants to have sex all the time. How am I supposed to show girls that I'm not like all the other jerks?

Reply:

Girls, while young, they don’t understand a man like you. They are not used to this sort of a ‘treatment’.
You are one of many hundreds, or even more guys. Most guys want to have sex and they don’t care at what cost.

Even I would doubt that was possible - I would question if you are ‘horny’ enough for your age.
Guys at your age are testosterone driven and they want to get between woman’s legs ASAP.
That’s their goal.

How to show the girls you are any different? They won’t believe you. Being nice to girls will ring ‘alarm bells’ – and what’s wrong with him? So, perhaps, you show girls the regular ‘boyish’ side of you that means you are after them, but you can ease down when the situation requires it.

In other words, you can play the role of an ordinary man. With an exception – you will be able to ‘back off’ when required. That will be easy for you compared to others.

To your question ‘Am I weird’; the answer is - yes. Normal males are after pussy. And now. Not any later.

So.... If you want to show the other girl you are not like another jerk, pretend to be a regular guy. And just give her some space.

You are either too mature (which is good); or have some problem with sex. I believe you are mature.
It should be easy to find a chick who will appreciate it.